Laughing Through the Dark Times

Maybe it’s just normal for weekends to feel shorter and the excitement to disappear as we get older, but why does this happen?

I remember just a few years ago when Fridays came along, I was so excited to relax and just do what I wanted to do. The weekend was my time. Now, at 31 years old, still single and no kids, nothing has changed. Nothing except for that feeling of excitement.

The weekends no longer feel like it’s my time. I feel a sense of guilt when I get to enjoy some peace and quiet and relaxation. When I am up at 7am on a Saturday morning, I feel that I need to get up and do something productive for the day. Whether that means doing some laundry, going to the gym, or going for a long walk, something has to be done.

What happened to the me that used to just vegetate out on the couch waiting for something to do? What happened to that sense of me owning that Saturday? Is this just something that happens as you get older and have more responsibility? Or is this a sign that you are ready to settle down into life and find someone or have a child?

Maybe it has come from 30 years of not stressing things. Maybe it comes from the exes that had anxiety when they did nothing and I just picked up their habits.

Whatever the reason, I hate this feeling of needing to accomplish something. I hate this feeling of guilt that I give myself when I finally have the time to do what I want to do.

We need to remember that life is short, and in order to enjoy life, we sometimes need those breaks from life. Those days of well-earned rest where doing nothing feels wrong, but is exactly what we need. Stop filling the calendar and just learn to enjoy things as they come.